Especially someone that you never thought you'd have an upset with?
Me too.
I felt inspired to write about this, because this is not the first time it has occurred to me that maybe there is a bigger picture at play, in these vastly changing times. Especially when it comes to challenges of communication and misunderstandings with those we love.
First, let's talk about love. If you truly love someone, you just love them. No amount of ick, can take away the love.....it is simply an 'is'. No divorce, break up, distance or egoic justification will mess with the love. That's why our minds have such a hard time with it, because inside we know.....and it doesn't make sense to the mind to be at odds.
Trust comes to mind next. When we are having a challenge with a situation, often one or both parties can get defensive or feel hurt. Really, it's the ego that feels hurt, and gets defensive. The truth is that who the other person is, is exactly who you know them to be. Love and kindness.
They or/and you just temporarily forgot who they are as a Divine Child of God. Can you trust your inner knowing of who they are, and can you trust yourself to stay in love, when talking to them? that is the question. Usually, when we don't feel called to resolve the issue, it's only because it is perceptively safer to stay away. Sometimes we need a long time away from them, so that we can get grounded again and come back to love. Just remember, no friend, therapist, psychic or 3rd party will ever replace your initial instinct about who that person is, the purity of their essence and the nature of your relationship with someone, or about who they are.
The problem - sometimes over time, we get to see the other's imperfections. Our old patterns. But are we looking for perfection, or for someone that we trust so much that we can work through anything........that is just giving our power away. Or are we looking to trust ourselves enough to come from love no matter what. In relationships, it is not that people show us 'who they really are' over time.......it's that based on each others' reactions to ego, we forget who we are if we don't stay conscious. You can never trust the ego. And you can always know that we are awakening, and remembering the Truth of who we are...........and ego keeps dissolving, if you can stay in your heart.
I used to believe what Maya Anjelou says: "when someone shows you who they are believe them the first time"......now I think it's more like "your instinct about the essence of someone is always right.....be willing to give up your judgment to see who someone really is. Annnd, take the time to ground, if you or they are forgetting who you are (acting like a jerk) ...come back to find harmony at some point."
The beauty of it all - if you are willing to trust life, and are lucky enough to have friends and loved ones that are willing to see things about themselves that don't work and see you as who you really are........and are willing to grow and expand into ever more freedom form the past....then you are looking at a truly optimal and fulfilling relationship ........because you just know it will all work out.
Feeling safe - sometimes in life we have had evidence that it does not always work out. Just because you have evidence, does not make it true. SOMETIMES WE ARE JUST TAKING SCORE TOO SOON.
Compassion in friendship - You can stay mad or upset the rest of your lives if you like. You have that option. You can get your friends to take sides, you can be sad and mope, you can move on in righteous indignation....however....and this is a big however.....
Don Miguel Ruiz and I in a moment......yes, he is that lovable.........
IN THESE TIMES OF GREAT CHANGE - we are all part of the shift on this planet, when we come from love, compassion and a willingness to be the change, we actually shift life not just for ourselves, but we are of service to the entire globe. By coming back to the innocence and purity of love, anything can be resolved when 2 present people are involved. You are either part of the inevitable expansion of peace within and without......or you are other than that. If you harbour any unresolved issues about another, you are contributing to the illusion of separation. Ignoring an issue is not peace......resolution is peace..and that shifts the planet. How can we not have compassion for another, when we have done the same thing.......bought into the illusion of separation.
LOVE AND ASSISTANCE: I don't know, maybe something is wrong with me that I feel/know that anything can be worked through if we come at it from love. Call me Polly-anna. I will continue to believe that.......and continue to dissolve those parts of me that are in reaction to the past, so that I too can make my world and therefore the world of those around me, and therefore the world in general a better place...........
ON THE FLIP SIDE: I don't know if you've noticed, but people you thought were "definitely a certain way" (says the ego trying to be safe from hurt), are changing....opening their hearts, growing in unimaginable ways. If you want to contribute to this expanding Heaven on Earth, leave room for people to show up differently than you think they are.....even if it may not happen in this lifetime.
PERSONALLY: Recently (in the last 4 months) I have shifted so drastically due to one of the deepest awakenings I have ever had. The old pattern had me defending myself, proving myself and living with a powerful drive to succeed. So humbling. Although I had definitely excavated a lot of it, it wasn't until recently that I got to totally free myself.........I feel so incredibly blessed, humbled and even more in love with my sisters and brothers out there in the world who love me as I am.
Thank you to all of my friends who have loved me despite my humanness......I strive to always do the same with you.......that is an act of true love, and I am honoured to have you as friends (and you know who you are). For those that judge me for past behaviours (including myself at times), just know I love you and am wide open to find the way to harmony if it should call you to talk.
Disharmony is temporary, congruence and oneness is available now on the planet........nothing less than love will take us there.
Try that on for a month or five,.....or a lifetime......got anything better to do? Me neither.
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